I have a tax question...

I've received some gifts and with these gifts, I think I have been elevated to the status of Super Rich.

I've received things like hand-crocheted ice cream cones. And special barbeque sauce from a fan. And, when Anna needed a dirndl for International Day at school, no sooner said than done. And look how sweet she looks.

And also Nana's bridge pad. Nana was a Long Island beauty queen and she left her granddaughter her Bernina. And her granddaughter sews my patterns and this granddaughter wrote me this note.

So, you see the great wealth I possess?

I'm looking though the tax code, but I'm not finding a place to declare this kind of intrinsic value. Which is good, because I know I would owe big time. And I am also fortunate that I don't need to find a shelter on some distant tropical island or tiny mountain country for my wealth (although Anna would fit right in in Liechtenstein, don't you think?). And I can increase this wealth tenfold by giving it away.